The Washington Post: How to complain better and strengthen relationships, according to experts

My husband is a good guy but often says things that I find

hurtful or insensitive. I know that I’m a sensitive person —

maybe too sensitive — but it’s making me feel more distant.

My mother was critical of my father, and he ended up leaving

her over it. I don’t want to be like her, but I also don’t know

how to talk about my feelings without looking too insecure or

acting like her. So, I end up doing nothing and feeling

resentful. Any recommendations?

At the heart of this question from one of my patients is the ability to

make our wishes clear. As a clinical psychologist who has worked with

couples and families for four decades, I believe that relationships can

suffer when partners don’t know how to give and receive constructive

feedback. I find that the key is learning how to address concerns in a

way that fosters understanding rather than resentment.

Here are some guidelines that I suggested to my patient, which may also

help others:

Read the full article here.