“5) You believe that your children need you around on a daily basis to counter the psychological problems of your partner”
WOW. This is the first time I’ve seen anyone capture the main reason I remain married. My wife is clinically depressed, and only a person who is unfortunate enough to be married to a clinically depressed person – even one that is ‘treated’ – can understand what that entails, but in a nutshell it means that you get pulled down into the swamp along with them, you take on extra burdens around the house (while they sleep), you end up being the only breadwinner, and most importantly – you need to be on guard to “undo” any wacked-out depressed views of the world they subtly inject into the child rearing process.
I stay in order to build strong values for my child and to innoculate him from the adverse, continual downward pull of her depression. I stay to provide a positive energetic responsible example for him. Unknown to him, I’m putting in far more energy than he can see externally, since I have to swim twice as hard to stay ahead of her depression.
Dr. Coleman, your #5 statement convinced me that I need to pick up your book.
Thanks, I look forward to it!
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