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father want to test me all the time!
June 13, 2016
12:51 pm
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onestepatatime
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MR, I might suggest you look up narcissist and see if this fits your father. I might also suggest you read Life Code by Dr Phil. Just because someone is our parents or our children, doesn't mean they are good people or that we can ever have a positive relationship with that person. It sure sounds like your dad has a personality disorder, it is not YOU, it is all about him. You can't change him but you can change yourself, your reactions, your caring. Learn to detach with him, stop caring about his arguments, his baiting words. Either cut back on how much you see or talk to him or learn to stop caring about his words and actions. Do not let them touch your heart. It is about his lack, his personality disorder, something. It is never about you. Understand his words are nothing, nothing, they mean nothing and don't take it personally. Also don't get into explaining, justifying, etc. Just answer and let it go. Don't try to be more and more rational, logical, thinking you will make him stop his behavior and become rational and logical. He never will. He is incapable of changing or being a good dad. It is not your fault and its time to stop giving your power away by allowing him to bait you or JADE you (make you justify, argue, defend, explain) over and over.

June 13, 2016
8:12 am
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carolyn
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Meganrussel, I feel for you that your father is unable to give you the respect and pride that you so wish to receive.  Has he always been this way?  I would be upfront with him how his questioning makes you feel and let him know that you will not carry on in these discussions anymore and just stop.  Do not give him the opportunity.  Obviously, he has some issues about himself where he may feel inferior to you.  Sad that he has to try and compete and is unable to just tell you how proud he is of you.  If you don't play the game with him it will stop.  Good luck.

June 12, 2016
6:34 pm
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meganrussel
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he thinks he can outsmart me by studying medicine and want me to feel insecure in every way -physically mentally..if i say anything about my success stories for even a little duration he would divert the topic or start boasting his success stories slowly and for very long time until i get irritated n bored,he never has given me space of self esteem in front of him.i feel sometimes he is jealous of my doctorate degree.his occupation was manager in a bank.now i lost all respect for him.he is a very self centered proud pride hungry animal.thats a decent way i can describe him now.

June 12, 2016
6:26 pm
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meganrussel
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have anyone felt this-my father wants to study the syllabus because i did so.

i am a doctor,my dad showed keen interest suddenly in medicine,so i thought why not i could teach him or enroll him in some online course,OMG

THATS IT after a online course of homeopathy he constantly tested me whether i knew things terms medical jargon etc....

he always wanted to have upperhand in any medical conversation i had with him,he started explaining me how things work,it was very irritating with so much wrong information.so then i realized he wanted to study just because he want to be even with me.he cant tolerate when i correct him,he repeats the sentence back to me i just told him as if he is correcting me!

what the heck i have done!

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