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Estranged from Dad
December 30, 2017
10:43 pm
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Fred
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Good evening Joe:

You should ask yourself exactly what you want? And maybe quandary if your feelings can take the rejection? My mama was a very absorbed, mean woman. She really didn't spend much time with me or her grandchildren. But I desperately wanted her in my life. I never gave up, I subjected myself to emotional pain and heartache. She's gone now and I have never regretted trying to change our friendship. You may get lucky, but you will still be able to reminisce that you tried. It gives me a little solace now when I yearn for her.

December 30, 2017
2:03 pm
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Joe
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Thanks and will try to make it short.  Been searching for why parents ignore adult children and ironically just see sites for grandparents ignored by adult children - even read one of them, and reversed roles, and ironically a little helpful. ... My dad divorced when we were children; dry alcoholic; and I lived with mom (bpd).  Now as an adult, my kids and I have minimal to no contact with him despite reaching out to him on a number of occasions. Recently heard from another family member that he looked frail over the holidays (may even be due to medications?) and were contacted to say we should reach out to him by showing up unexpectedly, and show him how much we love him.  I know more information might be useful, but does this situation show anything that you seen or pattern that you recognize.  And would you do anything at this point, knowing that you are being ignored anyway, for something reasons that never occurred in physical reality, except that he likely does not give a hoot, and likes the feeling of making others feel hurt by “isolation”.

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