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Wishing you a Merry Christmas
December 23, 2012
9:15 pm
Jane
Guest

Sylvia,  I emailed my daughter also and everyday I hope that she'll respond back.  I have beat myself up about this and one of my close friends suggested I see a counselor.  I am glad to have found this website and people such as you.  I think this will strengthen me and with God's strength I can get through this.  I hope the best for you and hope God gives you the strength you need.  May the holiday be as special to you as it can be.  I understand.  I wish the best for you and hopefully our girls will realize how much we love them and miss them.

December 23, 2012
8:58 pm
Sylvia
Guest

Hi Jane, thanks for the kind words. Sometimes you think your the only one feeling this way , and going through this. Its nice to know someone knows what your feeling. I to, rely on God, and have emailed and wrote my daugher, telling her I forgive her, and that I will always love her, and she will always be my daughter and a part of me. But, she has never responed. I hope one day, things will change , and for you to.  I hope one day, our love ones will come back to use.  Take care Jane, and hope to hear from you again.

December 22, 2012
11:29 pm
Jane
Guest

Sylvia,

I am in a similar situation such as yours and I have to say I know the feelings you are going through also.  It's so hard as others around me don't know the deep down hurt I'm feeling. I just don't understand but I've let her know how much I love her and I believe that's what we have to do.  I have another child who doesn't live at home and tells me to let her go also.  I think this is the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with.  I'm leaning on God to help me get through this and speaking with others who are dealing with something similar sure helps all of us.  Take care and know there are others that feel your pain.  Stay in touch.

December 22, 2012
11:11 pm
Jane
Guest

Sherry said
 As I set here, I read your post. And I want you to know how much it helped me. And Im sure alot of other parents that are without their child . Its comming up on Christmas, and I have one daughter that still lives at home. My other daughter dont want anything to do with me. This is going to be the second Christmas without her being here. I try to put on a happy face for my other daugher, but inside, there is a large hole that nothing can fill. I was to , a good mother, and did everything I could do for both my daughers. I to, just dont understand it. Ive tryed to talk to her, but she will not respond back. My youngest daugher thats home with me, says mom, just let her go. Its what she wants, and one day she will regreat it. But how can you let go. Its like part of you is missing. I try to seem happy and everthing is ok, cause of my other daughter. I dont want her to see how much Im hurting inside . I just dont understand, how someone you love, and just toss you aside, like you were nothing, and dont matter. I just cant get over that. Its been a year and a half. But, I just wanted you to know, your post , make my night alittle better. God bless everyone out there, and I hope they have a happy christmas. And knowing even if our child is not with us. They are were they are at, happy and alive. And that has to be our gift to ourselfs.

December 21, 2012
9:38 pm
Sylvia
Guest

 As I set here, I read your post. And I want you to know how much it helped me. And Im sure alot of other parents that are without their child . Its comming up on Christmas, and I have one daughter that still lives at home. My other daughter dont want anything to do with me. This is going to be the second Christmas without her being here. I try to put on a happy face for my other daugher, but inside, there is a large hole that nothing can fill. I was to , a good mother, and did everything I could do for both my daughers. I to, just dont understand it. Ive tryed to talk to her, but she will not respond back. My youngest daugher thats home with me, says mom, just let her go. Its what she wants, and one day she will regreat it. But how can you let go. Its like part of you is missing. I try to seem happy and everthing is ok, cause of my other daughter. I dont want her to see how much Im hurting inside . I just dont understand, how someone you love, and just toss you aside, like you were nothing, and dont matter. I just cant get over that. Its been a year and a half. But, I just wanted you to know, your post , make my night alittle better. God bless everyone out there, and I hope they have a happy christmas. And knowing even if our child is not with us. They are were they are at, happy and alive. And that has to be our gift to ourselfs.

December 20, 2012
12:15 am
Jane
Guest

Sherry, Thank you so much for your post.  I was unable to sleep and this helped me so much.  You are so right and I thank you for putting things into perspective.  You mentioned stages of grief and you are so right about this also.  I never imagined I'd be going through something so awful with someone I love so much.  You have helped me and I thank you again.  Wishing you a safe and Merry Christmas. 

December 17, 2012
5:33 pm
Sherry
Guest

                                It is 8 days till Christmas and once again some of us have  adult children who will not give us the chance to work through our family problems. I have over the years tried to figure out why and how this happened  to us. Recently someone asked me how I managed to deal with an adult child who rejected me and deal with the loss and pain.  Here is the best answer I have to offer. Once upon a time I longed for a girl. I would see mothers and daughters in a store and wonder what she would look like if I was blessed enough to have another child. June 14, 1974 that baby girl came into my life and I will forever be grateful to have known her as the beautiful blonde with blue eyes. She was so smart and so much fun. I made her clothes and stayed at home with her till she started school. She never let me down and excelled in school and collage.   She won awards in school and was a  beautiful person with a great ability in music and art. Her pictures are on my walls at home and as I write.  I glance up and see her face. I think  having hope and not giving in to self defeating behavior is a must. I think knowing you did the best you could as a parent helps. I think as long as she is alive and happy I can get past any heartbreak. I really believe you have to get passed the stages of grief as quick as you can and understand you have done all you can and just hope one Christmas will come and your lost child will return. I walked past her pictures on the wall today when she was in the first grade and I was heartbroken for the moms who's children were taken from them. My child is alive and I was there to see her become an adult. I hope this heart felt message will serve to help a parent of an adult child or an adult child  missing a parent.  God Bless America and keep our children safe.

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