TELESEMINAR SERIES FOR COUPLES AND PARENTS OF YOUNG CHILDREN AND TEENS
TELESEMINARS FOR ESTRANGED PARENTS
Featured Appearances
AARP The Stranger in Your Family
Dr. Coleman was interviewed in a recent AARP article by Meredith Maran on parental estrangement. To read the whole article go here: The Stranger in Your Family
NPR On Point with Tom Ashbrook
Dr. Coleman was invited to speak to the faculty and students on Dual-Career Couples at Harvard
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6:13 am
If you can afford to see a phychologist, I would recomment a few sessions for their help. You have done everything you can. When the other parent buys their love, supports their bad behavior and addiction, and encourages their disrespect of you, your hands are tied. The first thing I would do is get off of Facebook. I could not handle the things said about me by my ED. It only upsets you more to read it. I would stop all correspondence also. You tried, but she will not respond, so don't continue begging for her love. We all have problems – they have no right to make fun of any problem we have – medical or otherwise. Ignore it and hold your head high. Unfortunately, our estranged children have turned into a person we no longer know or understand. Until she does hit bottom and seek help for her addiction, she does not consider you or your feelings – it's part of the illness. You must 'let go'. AlAnon is a great place, and I'm sure some other parents going there are also dealing with the same heartache you are. I highly recommend it.
8:10 pm
My ED and I haven't spoken in a year. She now sides with my EXH, they are buddies. He loves this because he hates me. I sent her an apology Facebook message about 4 months ago. No response. A few weeks ago I sent her a message just to say I love you. She says horrible things about me, such as I hope my Mother rots in hell on her Facebook wall. We were always so close. I wasn't perfect . I initiated my divorce ( due to prolonged neglect and basically being a single parent within the marriage – no help in parenting, I did it all). Her Dad thinks its fine for her to smoke pot, run wild. She is now 18, so it is her choice now. Her Dad gives her money each month. I think it is to buy her love, keep her around and to piss me off. He won't let her hit rock bottom which is what the therapist thinks she needs to wake her up. I am bipolar and I think that is an easy excuse for both of them – "Mom is crazy!". Even if I make normal Mom mistakes it is blamed on that. I was dumb enough to believe her Dad would help me help her. What do I do now? I feel stupid continuing to send messages that she doesn't reply to, but also feel like she will think I have given up on her if I don't. I dont know what to do. I miss her yet I don't know who she is anymore. The daughter I had wasn't this person she is now.
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