I'm glad I read your post. Each situation is different, isn't it? Since this estrangement from my son, I am very sensitive about kids blaming parents and cutting ties. I know now, first hand, how awful that feels, as a mom. It's like my kid died, but I can't really grieve and move on, because every day there is still hope, and every day there is still disappointment. When you are a kid and screwed up, (me), people didn't stop loving you forever. They got mad, maybe punished, but in the end, you still belonged. This business of total and complete rejection for perceived screw ups is hurtful on so many levels. The irony is that I've had abandonment syndrome for a long time. I read books, fixed what I could, and am finally in a good relationship. Then, my own little boy abandons me for practically nothing...ridiculous misunderstandings that should have been talked out: so, here I go again, fighting the terror that I am basically unloveable: terror that has done a lot to hurt my current relationship. And, after working as hard as I could to be a good mom, now being labeled as "unfit to be around children". But, here I go...me, me, me. Just please make sure that cutting all ties is the only way before you do it. Yet, I also know that not all people. Or parents, are good. Some are self-centered, blind, deaf, and unable to even see that a little improvement might be in order. I'm sorry for you, and for all of us here who just keep getting thrown against the wall and broken over and over. I would never do that to my kids...give them such extreme doubts about who they are that they feel unloveable. Ever. I've chased down my son so many times that "stalker" would fit, but I have to stop, because for some reason, he believes I am the enemy. All I want him to know is that he's worth to much to me to give up on.,, even if he'd walk past me and not say "hello"; even if he'd have me arrested because I can't imagine the rest of my life without him in it. Hang in there....read, learn, heal.