We were indeed fortunate to have you with us. You are a terrific speaker!
— The John Hopkins University Center for Talented Youth,
Coming into a step family or blended family can be a challenge for every member of the new family. The main thing to remember is that you are not there to replace the old family and its members. You are simply coming together to form a new family that may have separate values or traditions than the previous families.
Dr. Coleman was invited to speak to the faculty and students on Dual-Career Couples at Harvard in November 2010
NPR: Tom Ashbrook interviews Dr Coleman and Kathleen Gerson on “Women Bringing Home the Bacon”
NPR On Point with Tom Ashbrook
Dr. Joshua Coleman is an internationally known expert in parenting, families, and relationships. He is Co-Chair of the Council on Contemporary Families and is a psychologist with a private practice in the San Francisco Bay Area.
One Comment
This is what I recommend for new stepparents:
1. Make a strong effort to befriend the ex. He/she can be your best advocate with the children (or your worst nightmare).
2. Discuss parenting differences with your spouse privately, never in front of the children. Defer to the bio parent whenever possible.
3. Put the couple relationship first; invest the time to nurture your relationship (you don’t have the benefit of child-free time after the honeymoon). Trust your spouse to always have your best interest (and your child’s) at heart. If you don’t believe this, you should enlist the help of a professional.
I’d close with “good luck”, but I know luck has nothing to do with it. I’ve been there, 10 years and going strong!